BlackMail
by Katiiey
Summary: What if Nappa and Raditz got caught by Vegeta stealing money from Frieza?And Nappa has miracuosly has a plan to save them.What is it?Blackmail Vegeta.This is my first fic so excuse any mistakes.
1. Chapter 1:Caught In The Act

First story so excuse me if it's corny. Probably is.Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ. Never ever will.  
  
Chapter 1:Caught In The Act  
  
"We got it!" yelled Raditz as a victorious smile crossed his face. In his hand was 5 mill in cold hard cash. He and Nappa were sitting in what was left of Frieza's vault.  
"Now all we gotta do is get the hell out of here with out bein' seen and...BOOM we're rich." Nappa said, "So great we found out where Frieza kept his wine money."  
"Nappa, shut up with your stupid sound-effects! Though we blasted the cams doesn't mean someone on the other side of the walls can't here us you clown!" Raditz screeched at him, he was not about to lose his money because of Nappa.  
"Sorry." he mumbled. They were ready to leave when they head a cold familiar voice behind them.  
"Oh you're not getting away, you've been caught in the act. I heard one of you go boom." Said Vegeta, his voice was mocking and there was a smug look on his face.  
Nappa, recovering the wits of a dunce he was born with before Raditz could reply said, "You'd better not tell no wudey or else."  
"Why shouldn't I?" Vegeta said smugly, "Besides I bet Frieza would notice his money was gone even if I don't tell him."  
"Yes he would because he's lying on the ground right now in his room too drunk to even twitch his tail, much less notice his money's gone." Raditz replied.  
"Still he'll be sober tomorrow so why shouldn't I tell him then?" Vegeta said bringing the point of the conversation back up.  
"Because we'll uhm, uh, gimme a minute. Oh yeah, we'll blackmail you!!" Nappa yelled pointing a finger at Vegeta, a broad grin crossed his face.  
"Fine, if you two can piece together enough brains to have something I might worry about you telling someone maybe I won't tell." And with that Vegeta walked off.  
"Nappa" Raditz said calmly.  
"Wha?" Nappa said looking confused at the look on Raditz's face.  
"I hate you, you dick head."

Review Please.And excuse any mistakes I make,I'm new ya know?


	2. Chapter 2:The Plan

Disclaimer: Katiiey: Raditz you're my hero. Raditz: uhm, thank you? Katiiey: Can I have DBZ now? Raditz: No cause that'd mean you'd own the rights to me which I don't want happening. And Akira would have to be psycho to give it to you. Katiiey: Hey I never thought of that, thanks for the inspiration to own DBZ. I'm gonna own Raditz Raditz: Damn  
  
Chapter 2:The Plan:  
  
"Bwahahah, he's gonna wish he'd NEVER born!! Hahahah!" Nappa said insanely.  
"Nappa knock it off, you're freaking me out. Raditz said, eyeing the money hungry Saiyan. "Are you drunk or something?"  
"Nope, should I be?" Nappa asked puzzled.  
"No you should not at the moment. Okay now back on track. Remember, this is important: Only give Vegeta the note. Not the tape. If you give him the tape this whole thing is ruined. Got it?"  
"Yes sir I have it all under control." Nappa said nodding his head.  
"Right then, I'll see ya later" said Raditz with a final wave and walked out the door to his quarters.  
Uhm, okay, wait what were Raditz's instructions again? Nappa thought straining his brain. He didn't want Raditz to think he couldn't do anything right. Oh yeah now I remember: Get note and, uhm TAPE! Tape and note to Vegeta. Then wait for Vegeta to tell us that he won't tell and then we're rich. OH YEAH!!  
Nappa walked down the hall to Vegeta quarters and snuck in. The lights were off, nobody was home. Nappa sighed in relief, the last thing he wanted was a pissed off Vegeta finding him breaking into his quarters. "Now where's a good place to put this..." Nappa thought aloud. "Couch no, top of T.V. no not there. In VCR, I doubt he'd ever look there. Ahah I know! On the bed."  
Once the package was in it's appointed spot Nappa left, thinking of all the things he could do with his money on the way.  
  
Side Note: Yes Napa seems stupid because he only has a brain when he's fighting and even then he still needs coaching. So don't complain if he seems too dumb. I like him dumb 


	3. Chapter 3:The Tape

Disclaimer: If I owned DBZ a lot of theses stories on FF would actually be DBZ episodes, so obviously I don't. Special thanks go out to Lady Kouga for being my first reviewer ever and for saying: Please continue this. This sounds good. Well I thank you very much. And now I continue, maybe.  
  
Chapter 3:The Tape:  
Vegeta walked into his bedroom, flinging aside his armor and kicking objects on the floor out of his way (Katiiey: Imagine the damage that caused ). He flopped on his bed and CRACK slammed his head on something hard but it didn't break miracously. "What the hell is this?!" Vegeta cursed looking at the tape. It was Saiyan proof obviously for it not to have broken. Then it clicked, this was what Nappa and Raditz planned to blackmail him with and there was a note on the top. He flipped the note over and read "Tweet, tweet birdie get the worm." He groaned at both the memory and the corny message. "Might as well watch the tape." He mumbled though he already knew what he'd be seeing  
  
There was a dark forest completely full of trees so almost no light could shine through. The voices of Nappa and Raditz could be heard yelling for Vegeta.  
"Where the hell did that little dick go?" Nappa cursed. Raditz, who was filming this all on his scouter, zoomed up to Nappa's face and said, "God Nappa, you're really ugly when you're p.o.ed and have your face zoomed in on."  
SMACK Raditz received a punch in the stomach and he coughed out blood. "Nasty taste blood, you wanna try some?" Raditz joked. Nappa had been pissed ever since Vegeta ran off.  
Nappa replied with a kick on his romp. "I think you killed my tail bone" Raditz gasped holding his arse.  
"Shut up and come on," Nappa said. "VEGETA!!! GET YOUR BUTT BACK HERE NOW!!" Nappa screamed at the top of his lungs.  
"I doubt he'll be able to if you keep screaming like that. I swear we're all gonna go deaf because of you." Raditz muttered. "Why'd he run again?"  
"Blew up a ship bringing in wine for Frieza. Thought for some dumb reason it was some enemy. Frieza beat the living crud out of him as soon as he found out. I told him not to blow it up though." Nappa said with a shrug.  
"No you didn't Crappa you big, mean, ugly liar." (Crappa is my word, I claim it ) Shouted Prince Vegeta at the big bodyguard. He was sitting up in the highest branches of a tree that would support his weight, arms crossed, eyes red, and his face was wet. Raditz could tell he had been crying. And his body was black and blue from Frieza's beating.  
"Vegeta," Raditz said softly, "Why don't you come down and we'll get those wounds fixed and then get something to eat?" Raditz knew any Saiyan, no matter what age, had a real weakness to the prospect of eating and fighting.  
Vegeta sat in the tree a minute longer thinking about Raditz's offer. "Uhm, okay." Vegeta said and hopped out of the tree. He landed and stumbled over his own feet and fell face first into a rock.  
"VEGETA!!" Both Nappa and Raditz cried, running over to the fallen prince. Nappa flipped him over and saw a large gash on his forehead. There was blood dripping down his face onto his shirt and some of the wounds he had received from Frieza that had scabbed over were reopened from the impact. He was a bloody mess.  
"Raditz, we'd better get him to the med bay and fast." Nappa said stating the obvious.  
"Oh gee George really?" Raditz said, full of sarcasm.  
"Yes. And who's George?" The T.V. screen went black.  
  
Pictures returned to the screen. Nappa and Raditz were laughing their heads off, the scouter had fallen to the floor.  
"Good lord, Vickychan's stories are funny!" Nappa said wiping a tear from his eye. (Tip of the hat to Vickychan and her Saiyan trio stories.) "Ah come on lets go check how Veggie's doing."  
They walked down to Vegeta's room and entered. He was standing on his bed, his head was cocked to one side looking curiously at the two somewodeys.  
"Ya'll right?" said Raditz looking at the prince with curiosity.  
"Birdie" Vegeta simply replied.  
"What about those dumb creatures?" Nappa asked.  
"I am Birdie Man!!" The eight year old cried. He threw his arms out to the side and ran around Raditz and Nappa, tweeting like a mad man, or bird in this case.  
"I think he's got brain damage." Nappa stated slowly. "Duh crap Nappa, quit stating the obvious. C'mon lets get him back to the medical bay." Raditz reached out to grab Vegeta so they could carry him off to the medical bay. But to no avail. Instead Vegeta bit Raditz's hand, drawing lots of hot, red, runny oozing, blood. Nappa fell down in laughter as Raditz hopped away from Vegeta as soon as the little had come back for another hand attack.  
(Raditz: Note to all, Katiiey loves writing about bloodshed. That's why poor old me keeps getting beat up! And she also wrote a major exaggeration about my bite wound. Katiiey: Radi-chan, SHUT UP!!)  
"Nappa shuzzit. 'Sides I've got an even better idea this time but I need your help." Raditz said cradling his hand.  
"Uhm alright. What is it that 'cha need me to do?" Nappa said watching Raditz.  
"Just answer a few questions first. Wanna prove you have intelligence first. What do birds like the most?"  
"Worms." Nappa answered easily.  
"Right, but we don't have worms do we. But we do have something close to them. And that my friend is where you come in." Raditz said evilly, staring at Nappa with a mischievous glint in his eyes.  
"Raditz, why are you staring at me like that? What are you...OWWW!!!" Nappa screamed. Raditz had his tail in his hand, rendering Nappa defenseless to whatever would come next.  
"Hey Birdie Man I got a worm for you!" Raditz said in a type of sing song way. Vegeta turned and looked at the wiggling appendage in Raditz's hand.  
"WORMY!" He screamed joyously. He ran forward as fast as his little legs would take him and chomped on Nappa's tail.  
Nappa screamed bloody murder. Here he was lying on the floor with his tail being manhandled and eaten by an eight year old prince who thought he was a bird. It was just too much to handle in one day. "Raditz get him off. Please get him off." Nappa pleaded but all Raditz did was stare at the first class with pure mirth in his eyes.  
"Ah is Nappa gonna cwry? Pwoor baby." Raditz said in the most annoying voice he could. He reached down and grabbed Nappa's hand. "Hi, ho, hi, ho. It's off to the med bay we go." Raditz sang as he pulled a whimpering Nappa and a choking Vegeta down the hall.  
"Raditz," Nappa asked a little while later. "Why the heck did you film all those things?"  
"I dunno. Just in case we ever have to blackmail Vegeta, I guess. Oh yeah did you show Vegeta what I got on my scouter?"  
"Yes and he said to never show anybody."  
  
"So, that's where they got the idea to blackmail me..."Vegeta mused. "Very good plan but when you work with Nappa something's bound to go wrong."  
Vegeta got up and ejected the tape from his VCR. And crushed it. "Yes something's gone wrong. Very wrong indeed."  
  
Review please cause the only person who's reviewed so far that I know of is Lady Kouga and Ya Know Who I Am. And I do know who ya am. 


	4. Chapter 4:Caught In The Act Again

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ and never will, but I do own Raditz. Raditz: What?! You little $$hole, bh of an author. Katiiey: OO potty mouth.  
  
Chapter 4:Caught In The Act... Again!  
Nappa and Raditz were sitting on the couch the next day dividing their money. Vegeta had met with them that morning and said he wouldn't tell. But not on oath.  
"Nappa, so where'd you put the..." Raditz started but was interrupted by a few loud bangs on the door.  
"Who do you think that is?" Nappa asked.  
"I don't know but it'd be bad if they saw us sitting in here with all that moola, so come on! Get off your lazy romp and hide the stuff." Then it clicked. "Oh damn it! It's probably Frieza!! HURRY!" Raditz said to Nappa as he went to the door. He opened the door so nobody could see into the room past him.  
"Oh, why h-hello Lord Frieza, uhm anything going on?" Raditz asked sheepishly staring at his short gay, girly tyrant of an employer. (My idea of Frieza's first form.) A throat clearing sound made Raditz look away from the lizard and caused his heart to pound against his ribcage. There was Vegeta in all his high and mighty self, standing behind Frieza with a victorious smirk on his face.  
"What's going on indeed." Said Frieza coldly. "Vegeta here said that you and Nappa have my wine money that went missing the other day and I want it back. So move out of my way Raditz"  
"But, but Sire, we don't have your money." Said Nappa nervously as Frieza glared daggers at him and Raditz threw his head in his hands at what he saw.  
"Then what's that, hmm?" said Vegeta pointing. Out of all the stupid ideas Nappa could have had picked, he just had to pick the dumbest. He sat on the money, just sat on it so that you could see the edge of the bills sticking out from under his huge butt. (He has to have a large butt to go with his body.)  
"GUARDS!!" Frieza yelled in outrage. Ten guards came in and dragged the twosome out of the room. "As for your punishments Raditz you will..."  
"Be my boyfriend?" The author popped off hopefully. "And make Nappa watch Barney for one month straight?"  
"Sure, sounds good to me." Frieza replied "Now off with those two. Both the men were screaming as they were dragged off in different directions.  
THE END  
  
Raditz: Now that the stories over I can leave you.Katiiey: But I was gonna have you scare the crap out of my friend who always draws pictures of you in a wedding dress with pigtails and a pimple faced groom.Raditz: Maybe I will syay for a while... Katiiey: I knew you'd se it my way. Laterz people.


End file.
